I am a 39 yr old woman with a 21 year old daughter whom I love to pieces - She makes me very proud. I have a partner that I have been with for 3 years. I was diagnosed June of 2014, even though I was feeling symptoms by September of 2013. Symptoms of what? You will soon find out…
We took our yearly trip to NY. When we go back I realized I had numbness in my feet and abdomen. I was just going to live with it as it started to become a way of life for me. A few months back I started having problems walking with my left leg. I went to my doctor and was told they didn’t know what was going on so asked for a referral for a neuro doctor. After my neuro doctor appointment, he told me I had what they call “foot drop, or drop foot” There were many blood tests and MRI’s prior to my appointment with the doctor and I awaited to hear what my results were.
The doctor looked at me and said “Here is what is going on, you have MS” I looked at him not really understanding. I asked if it was curable and how to get rid of it. He told me MS is not curable, but it is treatable. At that moment, I just started crying. At the time, I didn’t know what MS was. He looked at me and asked if I was OK. I told him I would be. I left the doctor’s office and went back to work and fell apart because everyone at work wanted to know what was going on.
I told my family and my partner. The worst part was telling my daughter. When my daughter heard the news, she wanted to know what MS was. I was supposed to always be here for my daughter and be the strong one. This was one of the hardest things I had to do. When she found out she looked into my eyes and said “Mama, you are going to be OK because you are a strong woman.” I believe her. She checks on me from time to time. Meanwhile, my partner started googling treatments trying to find out what we needed to do to keep the MS from getting worse. She wants to help me and always has. She tells me she wants us to have and live a long life together and I assure her I am going to be OK and we can still do the things we planned. Like walking around San Francisco and traveling to peru to clim machu Picchu. She slows down for me and asks me all the time how I am feeling and how my leg is. She has been very supportive and doesn’t let me get down on myself. Since I have told my family, friends and co-workers, I have received nothing but support and help. I know that there is so much more information out there for me and this is why I am here.
At first I was shocked and scared. I never thought anything like this would happen to me. I was sad. I also knew that I couldn’t let myself be sad because I had had to be strong for my daughter. I have always been strong for her and been there and I wouldn’t let this keep me from being her rock. My sister checks in on me constantly and my mom has her moments. I feel that I have risen above MS and not have not let it get me down. I still want to do so many things. I want to hike and go for bike rides. The things MS patients are not supposed to do. I refuse let MS limit me.
I hope to find more answers as to what triggers my illness. I want to know what I can and can’t do. I have found that the heat and being hot triggers my MS. I want to be educated on it and I want to help others with MS. My story may be able to help them. I joined a support group called “My MS team” and we blog daily about our day whether it is was good or bad. The others respond with their own stories or just a simple virtual hug. I have found that my MS has aggressive relapsing. I want to slow it down because I plan on being here for a long time.
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